Skip to main content

horrible...



We just returned from a wonderful supper at Philinos and a horrible movie called "The Wind That Shakes The Barley" about the beginnings of the IRA. I mean horrible in the sense that though the movie received awards for its craftsmanship, the horrors on the screen totally undid me and it was all I could do to stop my weeping after it ended and compose myself enough to get out of the theatre and walk back to the car. I don't know exactly what in this movie affected me so much, and frankly at this point, I don't want to think about it right now, but it was all just wrong, wrong wrong followed by more wrong. I still feel incredibly sad, no not sad - there is this cry of NO NO NO NO in my heart and there is nothing to make it right.

A good sleep, lots of hugs from Dean, and talking to Jesus are needed: that always puts things in better perspective for me.

This picture is of a GOOD thing: the entrance to the North Brooklyn Vineyard Down Under Room where we joined them for a profound look at Jesus' sacrifice and suffering on Good Friday.

Sacrifice and suffering are not worthy things in and of themselves: the cause or motivation must be pure and right and lovely. Let me think on things pure and right and lovely tonight.

I am going to bed.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Names of God

The Hebrew word "YHWH" (read from right to left) This past Sunday I gave a talk on the Names of God, the beginning of a series on this topic. This first talk was to be a gentle introduction so I thought it wouldn't take too many hours of preparation. Well, I quickly discovered that the research is almost bottomless; every time I thought I had a somewhat definitive list of names, I found another source which added a few more or gave a different twist on some of the names I had already come across. After several hours I was getting overwhelmed by the sheer amount of data (and that was only looking at the Hebrew Bible). I wondered how I could present this to people in an orderly and accessible fashion and within a reasonable time frame. Not everyone is up for a 3-hour lecture crammed full of detail on a Sunday morning. So I took a break and spent a bit of time meditating on this problem and asking the Spirit for guidance. And then I thought that being overwhelmed by Go...

soul refrigerator

I went grocery shopping yesterday and came home with three bags of food. After I unpacked them all, this is what my fridge looked like: really empty. How does that happen? How can I feel so full and ready for any food emergency one moment, and after one quick glance, realise that I have nothing, really? Today is one of those days in my soul as well. I woke up with gratitude and fullness in my heart, ready to take on this day and all the wonderful opportunities that it presented. Then I caught a brief glance of some emptiness in my life and bam - my buoyancy was compromised. For the past few hours I have been treading water, trying to keep my head in a positive space, bobbing in and out of disappointment, and catching myself whining with pathetic indignity at the cement blocks of other people's stupidity that are tangled around my ankles. When I am staring at the empty refrigerator of my soul, these are my thoughts. Where do I go from here? Perhaps I should slam that refrigerator ...

3 blog time stealers

Things have a been a bit slow in my blog-world lately because my usual schedule has been disrupted by wonderful but time-consuming events. ONE: I opened my first exhibit of photos this week. It is kind of a strange sensation to see ones art displayed in a public setting and have people study it up close and offer their comments. I have been pleasantly surprised by the reaction of all and am always amazed by the wonderful support of the folks in our church group and my friends from all walks of life. One of them even compared the dilapidated old stone church basement with fluorescent lighting where the exhibit is being held to the humble beginnings of some famous artist whose name I can't remember right now. I like the concept of humble beginnings because it is something Jesus loves as well. And beauty shows well in humble beginnings. TWO: I have been helping a far-off friend search for an apartment in Montreal. She emails me the details of a place she is interested in and I go sc...