outWORD by Matte Downey

One of the most persistent categories in the story of humanity is that of family. We hear the importance placed on family in our contemporary context: someone buying a million-dollar cottage says that the purchase is all about being together as a family, a contestant in a singing competition proclaims that their family is everything to them, a politician running for office declares that they stand for family values, religious folks urge us to stave off the attack on the traditional family, a celebrity steps out of the limelight stating that they want to focus on their family life. For the most part, these appeals to the worth of family are accepted and even applauded. The question is, what is the nature of the family we are giving priority to? The Oxford dictionary defines family  as 1) parents and children living together in a household or 2) all descendants of a common ancestor. However, many of us can attest to the fact that familial ties exist outside of legal and blood bon...

familiar: from the Latin familia , pertaining to one's family or household; intimate, very friendly, on a family footing Dean and I just returned from an epic trip which took us through France, Italy, and Spain. Our senses came alive and our feet nearly died as we walked and walked and walked the streets of Paris, Venice, Rome, and Girona. Everywhere we went was a place we had never been before. Everytime we got off a plane, a train, a bus (in Venice it was a waterbus), a subway, or stepped out of the car, we were in unfamiliar territory. Every day we were surrounded by different languages, different foods, different climates, and different cultures. Most everyone we met was a stranger. This kind of travel is an adventure in unfamiliarity. One is always encountering the unknown and therefore never quite sure what is coming next. Will it be a good experience or a bad experience? Will I find this new food tasty or will I want to spit it out? Where will this road lead me? When li...

Flying out of Winnipeg last night.  Really, it was that bright! I returned last night from a national gathering of leaders from Vineyard churches across Canada.  It was a jam-packed weekend and I think I did more talking and interacting than I probably will for the rest of the year (that's the introvert talking).  Though I am a bit tired, I know it was a moving and inspiring weekend.  There was lots of good stuff that happened.  It will take a bit of time to process, but I wrote some brief thoughts on it over at the Vineyard thoughtworks blog.  You can read about my exotic weekend away in Pinawa, Manitoba  here .

Winter scene in rural Manitoba.  December 2012. I took a break from writing a blog over Christmas.  To be honest, there was a lot going on but I wasn't sure how to write about it.  Going back to the place I grew up always presents a few challenges for me:  for the most part, I enjoy the vast beauty of the prairies and their crisp climate which conjure up vibrant memories of an uncomplicated and creative childhood, and I appreciate the precious family members and other friendly folks who still live there.  But my place of origin also has some trigger points for me and sometimes they can catch me off-guard.  This is really no different from any context which can transport us back to places where we were not at our best: places we have experienced tragedy, felt fear, been prone to anxiety, responded in anger, or lived through disappointment.  But sometimes childhood triggers can also be occasions ...

You will not have this - its mine! Words that a 5 year-old says when someone reaches for his toy. Words that a woman shouts when confronted by a thief demanding her purse. Words that a landowner utters when threatened by an invading king. You cannot take this away from me! Words that the slaves sung to remind themselves that freedom can always be carried in your heart. Words that martyrs cried out as they offered their lives for their beliefs. Words that lovers whispered when they were parted by war. Why are you taking this away from me? Words that Job flung at a God who seemed to be deaf to his pain. Words that don't know how this can end well. Words that the chronically downtrodden have forgotten how to form. Why did I give that up? Words of regret spoken in hindsight. Words that cannot bring it back. Words that reveal powerlessness and perhaps a lack of courage. Can you help me get it back? Words that carry hope. Words that have put aside self-reliance. Words that refuse to acce...

I am the youngest of three children. And yes, I exhibit a lot of the characteristics of this particular birth order station in the family. I want to differentiate myself from others, I sometimes battle feelings of being inadequate and small, and I can be outgoing and lots of fun when I have had a few cappuccinos. This morning I read the story of the father and his two sons in Luke 15. The youngest one demanded his inheritance early (a typical desire not to be overlooked or treated unfairly) and went out to do his own thing (stop comparing me to my older sibling!). But that's where the similarities to the baby of the family end for me. You see, I have never run off and done something really stupid, causing lots of people to worry about me. For the most part, you can find me faithfully going about the necessary business of life, so dependable that it's almost boring. I tend to lose patience with people who mess up and need lots of hand-holding to get back on track. I tota...

I am in Manitoba visiting family for 10 days. I am a bit at a loss as how to describe this vacation thus far. On the one hand, the familiar prairie landscape is amazing and beautiful and makes me stop and look long and often at the vast skies and sunsets that go on forever. My new niece is a treasure, and seeing Dean animatedly educate her about all the musical artists we are listening to and offer sound business advice on career choices is priceless (she is 4 months old). I loved hanging out with my big and strong nephews and beating them at mini golf (they will tell you otherwise, but don't listen to them - I think the scoring system was slightly biased and did not offer the proper handicap for people from Montreal). This rural life almost takes on a Disney movie quality in its wholesomeness and simplicity. But there are also some bittersweet moments. The one that probably touched me the most was going to the hospital with my mother. Her younger brother is dying of cancer and sh...