outWORD by Matte Downey

For: The Institute of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies , St. Stephen's University , Essentials Green Online Worship Values Course with Dan Wilt The trinitarian nature of the Godhead fascinates and puzzles me. It is like a prism or multidimensional sculpture that one cannot take in all at once, but every time you look, you catch a different angle. And so I keep looking and moving closer and catching new glimpses of this God who is unlike anything or anyone that I know. One. Three. One. Hard to describe. Virtually impossible not to be challenged and changed and loved by Him, if one is up for it. For my final project for Essentials Green, I painted something inspired by my studies on the trinity this year, both in this online course and in my theology classes in university. I turned the video camera on and started painting, not sure exactly what I would come up with. It turned out to be an afternoon of joyful and playful creation. Sticks, fingers, knives, apples, and paint a...

I just finished my last exam this morning. Well, let me qualify that: my last exam which completed my qualifying year for the MA in Theological Studies program. Beginning in September, I will be a full-fledged Masters student. I also have one final project to complete for my online worship course (stay tuned, it should be posted here in a few days) and then...I don't know. Perhaps I will read a book or go outside for a walk or do something crazy like watch television. Anything could happen. This in-between time, when one thing is coming to a close and new things are on the horizon is exciting and fragile. Like the green sprouts outside my front door, this transition phase needs careful tending in order to grow into something big and strong and beautiful. I am still learning to do this well. Too often I start something and then neglect it when I get distracted or busy. Or I jump ahead in the game and try to use a skill before I have taken the time to really learn the basics well. S...

Tea died this morning. For those of you who follow my blog, you will remember that she got very sick in December, but after some time at the pet hospital, some antibiotics, and lots of love and care, she recovered. She was never quite the same cat after that brush with death: her eating and drinking habits changed (we had to encourage her to eat and she was always thirsty) and she remained quite skinny, but she regained her energy and loved to be with people. When I returned on Thursday night after a short trip to Florida, I could see that Tea had deteriorated again. Even though we had a reliable cat-sitter come in every day, the wee kitty did not do well while we were away. I watched her struggle through the weekend and this morning, I could see that she had very little life left in her. She had not eaten in days, could hardly walk, and I had to assist her when she did attempt to drink and go to the bathroom. Dean said it was time, so I packed her in a box with her fuzzy red blanket,...

For: The Institute of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies , St. Stephen's University , Essentials Green Online Worship Values Course with Dan Wilt I just returned from 5 days in Florida. This trip held a number of firsts for me, one of which was flying first class. Thanks to the generosity of our hosts, Dean and I were able to enjoy this rare treat together. I had been told about the special treatment we would get: the special line to check in, the special food, the special attention to our needs, and the special seats. I was looking forward to this experience of not being one of the "regular" people for a change. We arrived at the airport and got into the special line which was indeed much shorter than the regular line, but soon after we got there, we saw our check-in agent walk away. She did not return for a long time, obviously dealing with the special needs of the people in front of us, and we were left standing there feeling somewhat un-special. At the stop-ov...

I am in Naples, Florida right now. Some things are just as I expected. The sun is hot and the weather is beautiful. Some things are different. Golf is pretty much the main past-time here and I am currently the youngest person in the 19 th Hole clubhouse. Interesting. Nevertheless, it is a wonderful place to hang out with Dean for a few days while he works from his boss' condo and we squeeze in some play time as well. On Thursday, one of my friends was talking to me about contemplating lessons from nature, like you find in the Bible: Consider the lilies, consider the ant, etc. There are many thing to be learned just by looking around us. Here are a few interesting observations from Naples: 1. There is a bald eagle on the golf course who watches your every move when you walk by. Comforting and unnerving at the same time. She is guarding a nearby nest, and I am sure she could probably take my arm off if she deemed it necessary. Be watchful, be alert, care for those you l...

For: The Institute of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies , St. Stephen's University , Essentials Green Online Worship Values Course with Dan Wilt Something interesting happened to me last week. We had a number of visitors at our Sunday evening meeting at church and at the end of the night, a guy came up to me and asked me if I was the person who answered the phone. I said, "Yes." The phone number given for the church on our website is my home number and always has been, so yes, if he called the church, he talked to me. He said he had called the church in 2005 when he was in the Netherlands. He had been facing a surgery the next day that he was concerned about and wanted someone to pray for him. I interrupted him at this point to say that I did not have a clear recollection of this call, but that I get a fair number of people who contact me with concerns. I usually just pray for them on the spot and unfortunately, the details do not stay with me for long. He confir...

For: The Institute of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies , St. Stephen's University , Essentials Green Online Worship Values Course with Dan Wilt The topics this week have been accessibility and cultural relevance in my online course. Not two of my favourite concepts, I have to admit. I think I have just had these ideas crammed down my throat by leaders once too often in order to get me (and other artists) to mellow out or put us more within their comfort zone. Or I could be misrepresenting the leadership's motives; I have been known to do that, but I do believe there is at least some partial truth in it. I am a pretty messy truth teller sometimes, this past week being a good case in point. I will see a hazy picture of a situation, grasp a partial wisdom, get a vague idea of where something is going, and then let the words fly without really ordering them into cohesive and accessible sentences. Yes, I need to develop my skills as a communicator, but I believe that truth...