disruption

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A nasty virus hit me a week ago on Thursday evening and laid me out for most of three days. I had proposals I was working on, a pile of paperwork on my dining room table that needed attention, preparations to make for church on Sunday, emails to answer, supplies to be bought, a house to clean, and laundry to be done. All of that was disrupted. The sickness rendered me unable to think, read, work, stand upright for any length of time, or do much else other than sleep and ingest the occasional protein smoothie. I thought of chocolate and had no interest. I thought of checking my email or Facebook and it just didn't seem to matter. I picked up a book and put it down again without even cracking it open. My fever finally broke Saturday evening, but I was still pretty useless the next day, my brain and body not capable of much. Monday morning, I woke up feeling almost normal. I decided to read a theology blog. My brain ate it up like it was the first bite of solid food in days. And with that bit of fuel, my brain immediately started to put together some writing ideas, plan a paper proposal, and thought of ways to incorporate what I had read into a research proposal. I said out loud, "Welcome back, brain!"

In some ways, it felt like my brain had been turned off and then on again, and the renewed clarity was a gift I humbly received. Once again I could see why a certain way of thinking wasn't working or making sense, I could articulate things, I could make connections between ideas. What had originally seemed like a total waste of three days, was somehow a good disruption, a Sabbath in disguise.

Life is riddled with disruptions. It is rare that something goes exactly as expected. The challenge and adventure of being human is this: how do we take everything that life throws at us and turn it into the most beautiful story of love and hope that we can manage? This is not an easy task, and though some of us would prefer if everything unfolded according to plan, that would make us closer to robots than humans. One thing a robot (or computer) is incapable of is wisdom. This virtue is gained through facing disruptions and adversity and, despite the odds, finding a compassionate way forward.

A disruption is basically neutral, meaning that it can be either good or bad depending on the context. Someone turning off your computer in the middle of a project would be a bad disruption. Someone turning off your computer when your screen freezes is a good disruption. Disease is a disruption of health, but healing is also a disruption of disease. Most disruptions are not so clearly defined; they tend to be a mix of good and bad, and it requires a good deal of discernment to extricate one from the other.

Right now, the political landscape is filled with disruptions. Many people don't know what to make of it. Those who thought things were going in the right direction are dismayed and troubled. Those who were fed up with the status quo feel empowered. The reactions are varied: denial, paralysis, bravado, resistance, compliance, and booing as well as cheering. But what is wisdom here? What is the way forward to writing the most beautiful and hopeful story we can manage? Digging in our heels and amplifying divisions will only create volatile situations, and engaging in power struggles has never ended well (it is called war). So what do we do? Might I suggest that we use these current disruptions to take a moment to rethink things, to reboot compassion, to lend our ears to voices we might have overlooked or neglected.

Disruptions are golden opportunities for us to learn something new about ourselves and our world and above all, be transformed into better disciples of Jesus. The choice is up to us. How will we respond to the disruptions? Here are a few ideas.

1. Disruptions can make us compassionate helpers or armchair critics. When disruption comes, we can choose to get close to those most affected by the disruption and alleviate their suffering or we can offer critiques at a distance where it costs us nothing.
2. Disruptions can humble us or make us more stubborn. We can choose to exhibit a willingness to listen, to question our assumptions, to step outside of our limited worldview and see someone else's, to admit that we don't know it all, or we can adopt a defensive stance, protecting our perceived rights and shoring up our sense of superiority by surrounding ourselves with agreeing voices.
3. Disruptions can draw us together or split us apart. We can choose whether we will open our arms and our homes or lock everything up tight in fear.
4. Disruptions can challenge us to find inner strength or steer us to outward shows of force. "Blessed are the peacemakers," Jesus said, "for they will be called children of God." Jesus never taught his disciples to threaten others or seek positions of power and influence in order to further their cause. Quite the opposite. He taught his followers not to fear those who can only harm the body.
5. Disruptions can make us bitter and angry or we can choose to face our own demons in ways we never have before. This is perhaps the biggest of challenge: to see ourselves in the faces of those we disagree with or those who are making our lives difficult. Jesus asks us to love God, to love our neighbours, and to love our enemies. That means love must rule.

Disruptions are harsh gifts, but they are gifts if we are willing to do the hard work of learning what wisdom they are offering and seeing what transformation is required in order for us to flourish in love and humility.