Friday, October 26, 2007

is



I am trying to get back to some creative projects in my life and it is proving rather difficult. There are just so many practical and necessary tasks and of course, valuble time with people and occasional guests and oh yes ongoing correspondence and my part-time job and then the unexpected and usually welcome interruptions that I like being able to respond to. I find it hard to be creative on cue, but I think it is something I must start to do- schedule my creativity.

I have been taking a module in identity (those life lessons God enrols one in and then provides lots of learning opportunities and homework and tests, you know the kind) and today when I was praying for someone while cleaning the bathroom, I realised I was asking God to BE an advocate for them when in fact, he already IS our advocate. So I changed my prayer and it became a declaration of sorts instead of a plea. And I think my life reflects that as well.

I live like I am pleading for something more, hoping for something better, asking for something to work out for me. When in fact, I could be declaring all the things that are already true (but perhaps have not been fully developed). It is my identity, even if it is still being formed, and I am made in the image of the one who has no trouble stating who he is. He identifies himself as I AM. He is all. He is my all. It is true and I don't have to plead over and over again for it to be so - truth exists because He is truth. I just have to stand on it and live in it.

I am a creative woman who loves God and people and is ever-expanding her world of wonder.

This is a street sign in Saint John, NB.

1 comment:

Shelley said...

Yea. I find I spend a lot of time wishing and asking God to make me into someone else...instead of more of who I am.

Lately he keeps telling me in different ways - "I love all of you - You know all the things about you that you don't like? I love."

I am trying to get it...because I am just starting to realize that when I do it breaks something...a focus on that part that I don't like, and frees me up to be more of who I am...more of what I do like in fact. Like I have made peace with another little part of me, because he loves that about me too.
I think that somehow by accepting and even loving those parts I don't like that I will let them loose; kind of give them permission to create havoc in my life...when in fact the opposite happens...they just kind of lie down in peace and get out of the way. It's weird.

We have no idea how much he loves us and values our relationship with Him...and what He will do to keep it...no idea.