outWORD by Matte Downey

That's a mustard seed in the palm of my hand. The dot right in the middle. Live long and prosper. This is the story of a mustard seed.  On January 22, 2013, as part of a spiritual formation course I was teaching (based on the book, The Good and Beautiful God ) a small group of us planted mustard seeds.  It was an activity which was supposed to help demonstrate the nature of faith.  I provided small plastic cups, black earth (not rich, extra nutrified potting soil, but just simple black dirt), and mustard seeds.  Most people took 2 or 3 or 4 seeds, just to make sure that at least one of them would sprout.  I opted for just one lone mustard seed, buried it in its black grave, watered it, and set it in a window which caught the afternoon sun in the middle of a Montreal winter. It sprouts! 5 days after planting. Within 5 days, a wee sprout popped out of the ground, a welcome sign of life.  I continued to check it almost daily, watering it when it was...

Wedding limo in the rain in my neighbourhood A few days ago, I gave a talk entitled Jesus and Sexuality .  Well, that's what I set out to talk about, but the emphasis shifted slightly as I began to read the relevant biblical passages. Let me explain. Sexual identity and gender issues are hot topics these days so I thought it would be a good idea to see what Jesus has to say about all this stuff.  Alas, Jesus does not spend a whole lot of time on the topic.  An obvious oversight on his part, one would think, since there were people engaged in all kinds of "questionable" sexual practices in his day (temple prostitution, homosexuality, sex outside of marriage) pretty similar to our times.  But Jesus doesn't really address any of these issues, not even when the religious leaders thrust a prostitute in front of him, allegedly caught in the act, and try to force him to take a position. And when he talks to a woman who is living with a man who is not her husband, the to...

I bought these shoes because they were cute, even if they didn't quite fit. I finally admitted it was a bad idea and sold them. Let's talk about shame.  You know those places in our lives where we feel ugly, stupid, useless, imperfect, slow, and lazy?  Those things we don't like to talk about?  Those are the places where shame can live.  In general, I am not a person who carries a lot of shame.  For the most part, I love the gift that is my life and bounce joyously into each new day (well, in the mornings I usually drag myself around sluggishly for a few hours, but by mid-afternoon I am close to bouncing).  However, the past few months I have felt a growing dread and dis-ease; it was shame and I didn't even know I was carrying it.  I finally realised it about 2 weeks ago when I saw it in another human being and identified with it.  Now, we all know that shame is counterproductive which is why none of us consciously goes the store, picks up a ...

I meant to capture the window display, but got the streetview instead. Hans Urs von Balthasar is "my guy."  And by this I mean that the Swiss theologian is at the core of my doctoral studies.  Frankly, a lot of the time I don't get what he's saying.  His ridiculously broad base of knowledge in pretty much every field of the humanities leaves me in the dust.  Nevertheless, when I am reading one of his more than 60 books, every few pages or so I come across something that strikes at the heart of the matter and I utter a "Yes!" and feel a slight shift in my thinking, like another piece of the puzzle falling into place.  More recently, I have begun to read a series of articles by 15 scholars compiled into a book entitled:   How Balthasar Changed my Mind .  This companion to Balthasar's writing has been delightful because of its easy, accessible style, and its ability to break Balthasar's incredible theological contribution into bite-sized pieces. It ...